Ever enter a bathroom stall and instantly learn more about the people who used the toilet before you...maybe more than you want to know? I'll finish later...
Okay, I finally have a few minutes to elaborate. So, as I was saying, it seems that there are several military members who like to express themselves in bathroom stalls here in Kuwait. Here are a few of the funniest so far:
1. Chuck Norris doesn't have to cut the grass...he just looks at it and dares it to grow.
2. Superman wears Chuck Norris night clothes to bed.
3. Chuck Norris visited The Virgin Islands and now they are just called "The Islands"
4. I love women and I love girls...don't ask, don't tell (in women's bathroom)
5. Obama versus McCain debate...not very polite.
So other than gossiping about the latest artwork in the bathroom stalls, there has been a bit of drama unfolding in our femal tent. Julie and I have been here since 9 Jan but other military females have arrived and left. One young Private First Class in our tent is quite interesting. LtCol. Meade (Julie) noticed a hardback book in her backpack titled, "Great Lesbian Erotica". What the.... okay, it gets better. At 3 am on 13 Jan, this girl decides to discuss her love life with another Army girl while Julie and I try to sleep. After about an hour of talk, I pull the sheets off of my head and give her a little advice of my own. Well, she really listened and after I returned from the gym, she reapproached me. At first she refered to her lover as "this person" but soon enough the "she" word came out. I told her about the problem with being homosexual in the military and can only hope she decides to keep her love life to herself in the future.
Other items of note for Monday and Tuesday included:
1. Asking a group of highly intellectual people to play Jeopardy to soon find out that I was going to get my butt kicked...learn from me, if they appear interested in playing, they probably are smarter than you!
2. Several of us believe we spotted Sasquach in the Chow Hall...large hunter's jacket, mullet and a strangely shaped beard covering everything from his eyes down!
3. Chocolate Ice Cream with sliced bananas is an excellent dessert. Yes, we even have that here!
I'll post my Kabul, Afghanistan address soon and will hopefully get there by mid-month. Our flight to Afghanistan was again delayed due to weather...will maybe get there by Thursday.
Love you all and don't forget to laugh!
Uhhhh.... "Learned about"? I hope you don't mean "caught something from"? :)
ReplyDeleteI made the mistake of telling your grandmother about your blog and your episode running through Kabul. I won't repeat everything she said except to say that was too dangerous and that she asked me to tell you to please be more careful. I told her you can take care of yourself but you know mama she still made me promise to tell you what she said.
ReplyDeleteMom was extremely happy that you created the blog and will be asking me every morning for an update on your postings. I promise to be more careful about what I tell to her.
She is coming back to Houston in about 5 weeks and will be cooking up a bunch of goodies to send to you in a care package we'll do together.
We are all so proud of you, all our love and prayers are with you. Please take care.
I am in all honesty now scared to read your next post :)
ReplyDeleteYou do learn some interesting things about people in the strangest places, and I do agree more than you usually want to know...
ReplyDeleteI'm very skeptical of what else you might be finding by living in close proximity of the people there. But anyway...I've started collecting blankets to send to the needy people you mentioned in Kabul. Last night I watched the movie you recommended "Kite Runner". It does give a person a good insight as to what atrocities most of the people are going through now since the war started. They are in need of any help we can give them, so if any of you reading this who want to contribute, please send your donations to Staci so she can distribute them to these people. If we show them we care, then maybe it will help to keep them and our troops safe. It's worth a try.....don't you think??
ReplyDeleteYes, I remember the good old days of reading Chuck Norris-isms!
ReplyDeleteHere are some of my favorites:
1) When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
2) Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
3) There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
4) Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
5) How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it.
And plenty more at:
http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
There are enough Chuck-isms at this website to at least get you through June, Staci!
John found a good one last night: When Chuck Norris does push ups, he doesn't push himself up. He pushes the ground down. lol
ReplyDelete